ONE STEP CLOSER TO THE GREAT WALL

I know that you guys are tired of hearing me rant about not having enough sleep on most days, right? Well, this is one of those days.. so hear it again! "I am soooooo tired and sleepy today!" There you go. Hehe. Here's why:


I went to the Chinese Consulate Office to apply for a Chinese Visa. I arrived there around 10:20AM.  I got a number from the guard and asked for an application form.

 They were serving number 954.

And I was number 147. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!

By the time my turn came, it was already 3 o'clock in the afternoooooon! Whoa! So now I have to go to work again in a couple of hours with barely enough sleep! Sigh. But it's okay. There's plenty of time for me to sleep in Beijing. LOL.


P.S. I was told to come back May 13th and pay P1,400 for a single-entry Tourist Visa.
P.P.S. The guy in window#4 looked cute. =) Hehehe!

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You can get your Chinese Visa here:

China Consular Office
Address: 2nd & 3rd Floor, the World Center, 330 Sen. Gil J. Puyat Avenue, Makati City, Metro Manila, Philippines

Mondays to Fridays 9am to 11am 

Please click here for a list of the requirements needed. 

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The Unpure Sleepy One,

-=K=-

HOW LONG IS YOUR SCHLONG?

I have a lot of crazy male friends and over the years, I have grown accustomed to their crazy, nonsense boy talks. LOL. What do they usually talk about? Aside from sex you mean? Hmmmm... well, virtually nothing else. Hahaha! I always end up in stitches when they talk about the size of their willies.


I even remember one time when a friend described his pecker as "ga-maling" [like the can of a luncheon meat]. Hahaha! WTF! Super laughtrip! That's his way of saying that his member has a wide girth and a thick base. LOL!




Sigh. Men and their barbaric ways. Hahaha! So anyway, to put an end to all these claims about having "the longest", or the "fattest", or the "biggest" man-meat, there's this cool online site called curiosite.com where you can purchase this thing called Condometric.

What is Condometric?

Condometric is the first prophylactic that measures and shows off the penis’ length. Condometric prophylactics are made of natural rubber latex and are electronically tested one by one. Its ink does not contain any ingredients that may cause allergic reactions.

I would appreciate it if one of my male readers try this out and get back to me with the size of your woody.


The Unpure "ga-maling" seeker,


-=K=-

RANDOM MUSINGS

xx I had a massage earlier and it was divine. So divine that I fell asleep a few minutes after the masseuse started kneading on my shoulders and back. I rarely sleep when I call for home-serviced massages for fear that they might steal something from me the moment I close my eyes. Thank God my 14-inch TV is still here! Hahah!


xx I have been writing technical articles as a 'sideline' for over a month now. They have given me another project recently - 18 articles due in 5 days. Social life has been nada for a week because of this. I like that they have given me diverse topics - from Data Governance to Money Markets to Giving a Woman the best orgasm ever! Hehe! Yes, I'm not kidding. I had a hard time conjuring up ideas about the 'O' part because I have always been on the receiving end of things. I have (and never will) not given any woman an orgasm - in whichever way, shape or form LOL!

xx I mixed a slice of banana in a glass full of Coffee-crumble flavored icecream and topped it with Chocolate syrup. My own version of banana split. Yum!


xx I need to get an NBI clearance soon because it's one of the requirements to get a Chinese Visa! Acccck! I don't want to fall in line in City Hall. The line's too long and it's too hot. Sigh. 


xx  I feel horny and weird. I think I'm about to get my period.






The Unpure One,




-=K=-




[Photo courtesy of: static.funnyjunk.com]

MY UNPURE PICK OF THE WEEK

I have seen a decent improvement in the number of hits since I started this blog December of last year and when I did a historical background of my posts that gathered the most views, I learned that the article was either sex-related or beauty and wellness-related. Because of this, I will start a new segment here where I'll feature products and/or services that I find amazing (or not). 


DISCLAIMER: I will only recommend products/services that I have personally tried/availed to ensure an honest-to-goodness review.
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We are vain creatures - men, women, men who want men, women who want women, men who want other men's women... LOL! You get the drift, right? Whether we admit it or not, we are very much particular about our skin and our over-all look.

I am not gifted with good skin.  In fact, I have uneven blotches on some parts of my face. Maybe because of sun exposure (without sunblock) or maybe because of shitty products I've used in the past (goodbye hydroquinone). It's a good thing that there was someone smart and vain enough to invent the concealer! Thank goodness for concealers! LOL! You're a definite lifesaver. Hahaha!

I have recently been introduced to this line of facial product that is not yet officially released in the market. When I learned that this product didn't have hydroquinone, I sort of fell in love with it from the get-go. I started using it just today and I will update you every once in awhile once I see results.

So for the meantime, just sit back, relax and don't forget to put sunblock while you're at it.



The Unpure Guinea Pig,



-=K=-

ZOMBIE!

Do you know of an effective drink or pill that I can take to help me keep my energy level high eventhough I only have a few hours of shut-eye? And no illegal drugs please! Hehe! I want something safe and legal.

I work at night and I juggle alot of activities during the day that I sometimes find myself only having 3-4 hours (or none at all) of sleep on the average. Yes I know, it's really bad for the health. Sigh. If I keep this routine for so long, I'm not sure if I'll ever reach the age of 40. Oh well, at least I had a 'busy' life. LOL! Yeah, whatever.

So anyway, I was googling for tips on how to keep my energy going all night and I found out that eating chocolates or any kind of sweets can only get you so far.

"When you're eating a sweet food, you get a spike in blood sugar, which gives you an initial burst of energy, But that's followed by a rapid drop in blood sugar, which in turn can leave you feeling very wiped out."

Hmmmm, the explanation given is logical - maybe that's why I'm feeling exhausted after drinking a sugar-filled-energy-drink (hello Redbull and Cobra!).  It gives me the energy I need but I feel like crap after the effect wears off. My mom says that eating bananas can help give you a little kick. A good friend of mine suggests that I eat nuts to increase my body's magnesium level.  Hmmmmm,what about you? Any suggestions?


The Unpure Vamp,


-=K=-


[Photocredit: nytimes.com]