Of Bags and Relationships

I got a brand-spankin' new "bag" a couple of months ago. It was shiny and pretty and it looked like it had all of the things that I needed in a bag. I saw it on the display. It was beckoning to me, calling to me -  the bag wanted me to take it home.

There were actually a couple of other bags on the display. There were some that looked sparkly but you know deep down inside that it's not the type of bag that you wanted. There were others that looked exactly like what you were looking for but when you tried to open the flap, you realized that there just wasn't any kind of connection at all. There were some that had the perfect "bling" on the outside but on the inside it was just blah.

Since I still can't find my "bag", I looked some more. I tried searching for "the one". But I realized that the more I searched, the more elusive it became.

So I stopped searching. I relaxed a little. I prayed a lot. And just when I was about to give up on my quest to find the "perfect bag", something magical happened. There was this one "bag" on the display that caught my fancy. It had all of the little specifications that I was looking for. It was shiny, it was brand new. It was pretty.

I used this bag almost everyday. I brought it with me wherever I went. I've even showed my friends how nice my bag looked. I welcomed the bag in my world. I welcomed the bag in my life. I cleaned it, cared for it. I didn't want to part with it.

But after several months of using the bag, some of its stitching came undone. It still served its purpose but it wasn't like how it was when I first got it. I became disappointed. I blamed it on the (quality of the) bag. There came a point when I felt like the "bag" was neglecting me... like it didn't want me anymore. I felt like the bag was trying to destroy itself on purpose so I can dispose it already.

And then one day it dawned on me -  It wasn't just the bag that lost its luster. I was also to blame because I didn't care for it well. I also had my share of shortcomings. I still care for the bag, don't get me wrong. But there are times when I feel inadequate.

The "ohhhssss" and "ahhhs" that I muttered when I first saw the bag has been replaced with a little whining here and there.

The magic has waned. The luster has faded.

There were times when I thought I couldn't live with it anymore. There were days when the thought of just leaving the bag looked enticing. But did I leave the bag? Did I ditch it? NO.

I am no masochist but I am really very patient when it comes to things that I deem important. I don't think it's right to just leave my bag to the trash only because it's not as functional as when I first got it.  I've gone through good and bad moments with my bag. I've never cared for any other bag the way I do with this one.

There are other bags out there who want me to take them home.  But I really have my eyes focused on this one - "my" bag.

I'm holding on to my bag. I will continue to love and care for it. I will nurture it the best I can. It's been a rough ride lately, but I know things will get better. I know it will.

It's true that love is sweet when it's new. But in reality, it's sweeter when you try to make it through the rough patch and choose to be together even when it really sucks.

So what happens now that the magic's gone? Well, my bag and I will create our own magic. =)

We can do this. I know we will.


The Unpure One,


-=K=-