Monday, January 3, 2011

The 4 L's of Loving

We Love.
  We Lose.
    We Learn.
      We Let Go.

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Loved.

If you follow my blog regularly, you might have picked up on some mushy posts that I have made a couple of months back about me and a boy. Yes, I loved. I loved dearly and I loved with all my heart. It had a wonderful start, a great follow-through and a not-so-good ending. (Pretty much like the ones you see in MMK or those tagalog series you watch on primetime TV. *insert chuckle*)

Lost.

I thought that I have already found my match in him.  It was really magical. Even my friends and family were happy for me because they saw in my eyes that I was truly happy. It still gives a slight (READ: slight na lang!) pain in my heart everytime I refer to the whole thing in the past tense. I WAS happy. It WAS magical. WAS! It was a product of the past. 

Learned.

I have learned alot of things because of that experience. I have learned that it is okay to trust on my instincts. I have always been an optimistic person. I have always thought that the world's full of kind and warm people with nothing but good intentions. But I discounted the fact that there are also people out there who will try to manipulate you, coax you and lie to you just so they can play out their hidden agendas.

But now I learned my lesson.

Let Go.

Like what I said, it had a wonderful start, we had alot of awesome memories. I had a hard time letting go at first. I made several attempts to cut the cord but I kept sliding back. Until finally, I came to my senses and I realized that I should love myself more than anything/anyone.  And cliche as it may sound, I realized that I am too good of a woman to settle for less than anything that I deserve. So I finally let go. I bid goodybe. And this time, there's no turning back.

My heart is somewhere between grieving and healing.  I am finding comfort in the warm hugs and sincere smiles of family and friends. And there's this one song that I keep playing over and over and over to help me get through the pain. I find comfort in the lyrics of this song. And true to the lyrics, I know that it will all get better in time. =)

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BETTER IN TIME by Leona Lewis




Better In Time

It's been the longest winter without you

I didn't know where to turn to
See somehow I can't forget you
After all that we've been through

Going coming
Thought I heard a knock
Who's there no one
Thinking that I deserve it
Now I realize that I really didn't know
If you didn't notice you mean everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All that I know is I'mma be ok

[Chorus:]
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
Even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

I couldn't turn on the TV
Without something there to remind me
Was it all that easy
To just put aside your feelings

If I'm dreaming don't wanna laugh
Hurt my feelings but that's the path
I'll believe in
And I know time will heal it
If you didn't notice boy you mean everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'mma be ok

Since there's no more you and me
It's time I let you go
So I can be free
And live my life how it should be
No matter how hard it is I'll be fine without you
Yes I will


The Unpure One,


-=K=-

26 comments:

Oliver said...

ay naku.. wala ung isang L na gusto ko... kulang, ahahhaha

-=K=- said...

At anong L ito aber? :p

Leo said...

alam mo K, sabi ni pareng Gustave Flaubert, "Love is a springtime plant that perfumes everything with its hope, even the ruins to which it clings." so love again... and it'll get better in time. i love you khacai!!! sana sa 2011 magkita naman tayo nila nimmy, magphoto-walk tayo!!! bet???

Nimmy said...

wow! yan pala ang process of letting go mo 'teh! mabuti walang anger. hihi

DENASE said...

Hi. I just happened to stop by here.



http://arandomshit.blogspot.com/

Leah said...

The 4 L's.. so true.

Meron akong idadagdag, after "letting go"..

LIVE and LOVE AGAIN.

It doesn't have to end there kasi. Tamah? Hehe.. After the letting go part, after the death of the one love you've nurtured, after the pain.. comes the healing and living and loving again. It's one of those circle-of-life kind of thing.. Diva? Toinks!

Cheer up, Ms K! =)

khantotantra said...

di na ako makiki-usyoso kung ano nangyari.

Pero it good na your letting go. It could be painful yet there's a good part. You loved and you learned.

soltero said...

i agree with Lea...

after Letting Go,

we should learn to LOVE AGAIN...

ahihihihi choz!

Happy New Year!!

-=K=- said...

Leo - I love you too! Susme, ayoko munang maglove again. Pahinga muna! Hehe. Papayag lang ako magphotowalk tayo pag ako ang subject nyo! Chos! Misyu! Kita tayo sooooonnnnnnn please!

Nimmy - ahmmmm, may konting anger. Pero alam mo naman ako, mabaet. Kaya wala masyadong poot. Bahala na si Lord sa mga bad people. Hehehe! Photowalk!!!!!!

-=K=- said...

Leah - yup tooommmoooohh! :) Ndi ko talaga sinali yung Living and Loving again on purpose. Hehe! Rest muna. :) Thanks for dropping by! Yup, I'm feeling a bit chirpy na the past few days. Medyo ok ok na. Hehe.

Khantotantra - thanks my friend. Yeah, lets not go into the gory details of my pathetic lovelife. Hehehe! Happy New Year sayo :)


Josh - tama na muna yang love love na yan! Hehehe! Magmamadre nalang ako! Choz! :p

Andy said...

bakit kulang ng LANDI? LOL!

The Gasoline Dude said...

Nakita ko picture niyo ni Bulakbolero na magki-kiss. Baka siya na ang sunod? LOL! Happy New Year! :)

-=K=- said...

Bwahahahaha! First time ko sila makasama nun pero dahil makapal muka ko, feeling close ako. Ngayon ko lang narealize - kahiya-hiya ako! LOL. Happy New Yr :p

-=K=- said...

Andy - syempre after Letting GO ang next stage na ulit nyan Landi! Hahahaha! Kaloka.

Leah said...

BUmalik ako dito.. kasi I have to read ulit your post.. Nangyari kasi sa akin. Hay.. So sad. Now I have to learn to let go.. ang hirap.

I'm feeling down rin.. but I know I'll be alright. Medyo meron lang inferiority issues and self pity na nangyayari.. but as I've said sa comment ko (na binasa ko ulit.. ironic lang. hehe), I'd learn to live and love again.. Pero not now rin. Medyo nakakatamad lang..

Toinks!

-=K=- said...

Leah - onga, I read your latest post. Hay. Pag di ka na masaya at wala ka ng peace of mind, umalis ka na. :) Love yourself first. Paulit ulit ko rin yang sinabe sa sarili ko e. Hehehehe! Pakinggan mo nalang yung better in time :)

Dorm Boy said...

As I go on and live my life, I consider most the Learned and Let Go Area in loving.

Happy New Year and may u have more love overflowing for 2011!

-=K=- said...

Thanks DB :) I read your "Dormboy Is In a Relationship" post. Hehe, kaaliw.

Anonymous said...

Hi, i haven't been visiting for a long time, but i just wanted to express, from the heart, my warmest birthday wishes for you here.

Funny, reading your post, i got to thinking how just like you, i got involved with someone last year. It was one of those things that shouldn't have happened, but it did. And i should have just shrugged it off and walked away when she wanted to move on. But i fell in love with her.

Life is fragile and full of uncertainty, but i know that in my own imperfect way, i will always love her. I keep asking myself, what is going on with you? But it's one of those things that happens, maybe once in a lifetime.

In my book, loving someone, notwithstanding your own needs, is wanting only the best for that person and putting her ahead of yourself.

For me there's still pain that's getting sorted out, but maybe it's a good thing. Like all of us, i'd prefer life to be all sunshine and lazing on the beach with a cool drink, but that's not how it is. So we do our best, and try not to lose sight of what's good and bad, thinking of others, and becoming better people, through adversity, hurt, disappointment, and disillusionment.

So may your life continue to grow in love, meaning, strength, wisdom, inner happiness, and fulfillment.

Many happy returns of the day!

-=K=- said...

No Comment ako sayo. Hehe. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

happy birthday!

-=K=- said...

Thank you :)

Xprosaic said...

bakit wala yung isa pa... nyahahhahah sinabi na nga nila... wala ang L****... nyahhahahahha... pero parang gatas lang oh... "Look mom I got dirty and hurt... but see... I've learned!" ....lol

Anonymous said...

When i love someone, and the time for getting hurt comes, i'd rather that it be me, not her.

dwizzt said...

haaay.. ka-relate much.. heheehe :D

Anonymous said...

Sometimes in vivid dreams
what should have died
comes back to life.
Then one awakens to a darkness
of disquiet
nothing more.
But maybe
once in a rare while
some things never die.